Tuesday, September 24, 2013

A bunch of nothin'

I can't really call myself a blogger anymore... considering I can't seem to find time to write... or clean or exercise or breathe.  You know all the usual things we lack time for.

I'm off today but not as celebratory as I would like.  I have inventory Friday and had to move my schedule around to make sure I'm there to prep, count and enjoy the wonder of my pidglets complaining they didn't get to see me when they got off the bus before they went to their dad's house.

While I'm trying oh so hard to make things for the cottage.  And... I have been somewhat successful it's still not listed yet.



Yesterday was pretty much an awful day.  I went to the doctor last week and did get a "much better" bill of health; however I am definitely slowly but surely sliding a bit backwards.  I've been sick but functioning for a week now.  

Here's the frustration in that... I'm not "sick" anymore.  I don't have C-diff anymore and I'm taking care of my Celiac and reluctantly (at times I near the bakery) staying off of gluten.  So, I should be done right?  No more of this stuff.  Well, it shows you what I know.  (wink)

I asked the doctor, "Is this just permanent now?  Am I just fragile now?"

Fragile... eww... I shudder at that word when linking it to myself.  Pshhh... I learned I have limits but this is not cool.  Of course she gave me the doctor answer, "Well, only time will tell.  You might very well be facing this for the rest of your life.  Or, it just might take a lot longer than you anticipated."

Really?  I had to pay for that too.  

As you can see I've been in a funk for a bit.  I'm mad at my body, mad at the Pidglets, mad at people who make GF products so dang expensive and mad at the last king size snickers bar I ate that I use to keep my weight up... because I ate it and it's gone.

But I'm happy with Fall who is on it's way, happy with the two awful dogs that are curled up at the bottom of my bed.  I'm pleased with the pumpkins and birds that are sitting on my desk and the pumpkin spice Scentsy that is permeating through the house.  

Oh, and I'm mad no one in this house likes chili because I really want it but only make in "vat" size.  Yes, I can freeze it but that's not the point, they should love it.

Well, now that we've gotten all of the important stuff out of the way I'll leave you with one more thing that makes me actually keep my children.

This morning I had to run Po to work at 5am.  I had woken up with a terrible brain ache so I went to lay down before I had to take the girls to seminary at 6am.  Lil man had wandered into my bed after I had run out so I climbed in and grabbed a small stuffed dog he offered me. He is always very concerned that I have something to snuggle with.  He keeps a stash of stuffed animals on my side table that I have to choose from each night.

Next comes Moi... she slips in from the kitchen and crawls in behind Lil man.  Then through my door I see Lil Red sleepily appear  She walks around and looks in from the kitchen door, "Awww man.... Lucky." she says, then quietly places herself at the bottom of the bed.  We haven't done this in a while and it was nice and quite and relaxing .... until Busy comes in and starts being the mom telling us we're all going to be late.  No doubt she was only irritated because there wasn't room for her; which has never stopped her before.  

I asked Lil Red to go get Ethan up, which she strangely - promptly did.  I hear her in the next room waking him up as if she was a news reporter.  After a minute he's giggling and I hear Lil Red, "Back to you Clint..."

Yes, they still fought to and from seminary but it was that earlier moment I chose to think about all day.

Over and Out... 




Thursday, September 12, 2013

Checking in...

I have recently come to terms with a few things.  Mostly "closure" on a subject that I've known the answer to for years.  It bites.  It does.  But it is... what it is.

Know what's funny?  (not really funny, I have no idea why I always say that) But I.Am.Okay.

I am.



Sure life hands you lemons, heck life hands you rotten lemons but I'm used to those.  I can drink water, forget the lemonade.



What I'm saying is.  I'm built of strong stock.  I'm blessed with endurance. I prefer being positive so that after a while I might even believe all of the hearts and flowers I'm throwing out to the wind.

I have beautiful (horrible) amazing and most importantly phenomenally strong off spring.  My babies are my purpose and giving them my physical, and mental body, if you will, has been the biggest blessing of my life.



I have a great job with people I love.

I have free therapy in keeping up with my shops... yay for therapy! (wink)

I have food, shelter and lots of caffeine.

I. AM. LOVED.  



I have future plans of betterment for those I love back.



Gratitude... living simply allows me to see the little things a bit brighter.

Things are changing again, in a big way.  And I'm okay.  Sure I have "those" days.  Sure I'll have a lot more.  But today, I am thankful, and humbled, and smiling.

Have a great rest of the day, I just wanted to check in with the blog to see if it was still working.  (snicker)

Over and out,


Friday, September 6, 2013

Discombobbled...

Discombobbled... the state of being discombobulated but with a funnier twist as it rolls off your tongue.

He he.. (not to be mistaken with Hee hee)

So, I love work.  But I've been off for two days and I love being in the workshop pumping out crafts for the Cottage shop.

I love being home when the kids get home.  But being at work, I love doing something outside of the home where for the most part I accomplish much.

My body is holding up... most days.  It's those few days that worry me if I made the right decision in going back to work.

I love having a consistent paycheck.  My shops have picked up since going back to work.  (really?  yah.)

I have several other thoughts going off like fireworks in my head but those are combative and probably shouldn't be printed for all generations to come.  Do you have those deep dark thoughts that you keep hidden from the world?  Me, I'm one who's open and talks about everything.  Anyone who knows me thinks that.  But then again, they don't really know me.  It's that camouflage I put on each day; the one with the smile and a pep to my stride.  I'm tired.  I wish I knew the exact direction to take.  

I'm improving and each day I see something brighter even if it's just a stray piece of glitter.  I wish others could see the glitter.  I'm staying positive (notice how I didn't say "trying"... that's because I'm doing it... regardless)  But truth be told I have a lot to be thankful for.

I'm worried about a lot of things but I've decided those things are out of my control so I leave it to prayer and do the best that I can each day.  

I want to get back to writing... oh so bad.  I need to keep blogging to keep my thoughts in order.  Although I'm very well aware that those of you reading this are thinking, "Really?  This is in order?"  

I need to get back to goal setting.  I need to follow through.  I need to accomplish.  I need to figure out what I want to do when I grow up.

I'm attempting to stifle my caffeine intake (yes, the ADHD is cruel and unyielding but it's something I want to do)  I'm trying to get rid of a few "crutches" and become the person that relies solely on Him and not on me, who is terribly unreliable when it comes to self-help.  That's not true, but I'm not as good at it as Him.

I want to set a better example.  I want my pidglets to follow their dreams.  I want to follow mine.  I'm not certain what those are yet.  Well, I'm not certain what the immediate ones are anyway.  You know, the ones that you can actually make happen right now.

I love fall.  It needs to come quickly.  I love my house when it's quiet.  I miss my pidglets when they're gone.

I probably should start with a lil caffeine opposed to zero.  

With paint on my hands and my piano playlist in the background I'm going back to enjoy my last day off this week creating autumn wonders.  The smell of ginger cookies from my Scentsy is filling the house.  Inspiration creeping through the corners of my craft room; I'll make a list.

I need a magic 8 ball.  That oughtta do it.  Answers from the purple waters of fate.  What should I do with my life?

There's more.  I can feel it.

Have a wondermous weekend!



Thursday, September 5, 2013

Three pieces of advice...


So Nay is giving me all that "sap" about her day doesn't seem complete without reading my blog. Pshh... well, she's the only one.  Truth be told I've felt a lil boring lately.  Work is work, I've been attacked by allergies kids are kids and Po... he's still just as "Po" as he's ever been.  

Not really much to report.  Not really a description to make my every day mundane "stuffs" sound funny or ridiculous.  

She says do "Blogtember" with me.  Uhhhggg.... my Nay!  Why must you require so much effort from me when I'm attempting to sound uninterested when really I'm lazy?  

Fine.

Today's prompt... "Pass on some useful information/advice you have learned"  

Fine, it didn't say those exact words but I'm again, too slothful to look back.

Advice... 

What always comes to mind is my full of wisdom and a few other things dear Mama.  We grew up with two phrases or pieces of steady, unwavering advice from Mom.

Save your money AND life is hard.

There done.  That's how I was raised.

Can the woman just become the President of the world or something?  I mean truly those are two of the most important guidelines I have ever come across.  And to think how blessed I was to have been brought up with those words of wisdom.

For how funny it is to Mama, she is dang right.  I mean "save your money".  Uhh... yahhh.  I mean does that really need explanation?  No.  But how many of us do it?  How many of us need to and needed to at a young age instead of learning the hard way when we're older and on our own where we can really mess up?

"Life is hard" Wow, that one brings tears to my eyes.  Oh how it would prick my irritation when I was a kid but oh how much fun it is to say to my children.  It is what it is peeps.

Life. Is. Hard.

It's better you know that straight out of the gate.  It's not hearts and flowers, it's hard.  But it's worth a lot of hard work to put all you've got into it.  I kind of like accomplishing each day and knowing I did it and it was hard.  In all seriousness, hard doesn't make room for excuses and I like that.   

The third piece of advice was from a Bishop of mine who quoted Clint Eastwood... "A man's gotta know his limitations"

In all of the super-mom, super-wife, cleaning, working, saving the day from dust, grime and whining... I have learned to say no.  I have learned (especially after last year) that I actually have limitations.  Something I really didn't see coming.  But that phrase has helped me in so many situations.  It doesn't mean quit or don't try or it's too hard.  It means know your capacity.  I got it.  

This message has been brought to you by Pidg of PidgApeg.com.  I'm leaving now to go stuff more pumpkins.  I think I've reached my limitations of lame for the day.

Over and here's to one more day off!











If you're interested in joining "Blogtember" click on the button below.  I'm interested... Just ask Nay... (wink)