Monday, October 31, 2011

An Email...

This post was originally an email to Nay.  Then I started laughing at my sad lil self and decided to share it with the rest of you for an entertaining morning.  So grab a cup of joe and a side of dry Mr. B,
{Yah, he can be a lil hard to swallow at times.}
Don't forget your side of sarcasm.
And pull up for the “How she does it” side of harassment.  Tonight’s story {or morning} comes to you via email.  Oh, the wonders of internet and how quickly one can torment you while sitting in the comfort of your own home.  {chuckle}

But not tonight - tonight I hold the reigns of insanity and chose to laugh when I wanted stick pins in my eyeballs. 
{I’ll be honest, It was a toss-up.}

Nay doesn’t usually have internet access on the weekends…something about family time…sheesh…whateves…Haha!  But really, I always email her on the weekends as if she is there reading them; most of the time it is an entertaining “I missed you!” sort of upbeat thing she comes into on Monday.  But tonight, I was feeling a bit cranky due to the weekend being a lil bit cruddy so I told her I was going to write {which I didn’t} 
and be happier when she got the next email.   
Here is that happy email:

I know after my first email you're probably worried about me...but don't worry.  I am A-okay.  I've {so far} had 5 ...wait, maybe 6 emails from Mr. B telling me what a crappy, loser-ish person/mother I am.  Oh, good times, good times.  I feel so much better now.
It's funny when you're feeling down and someone almost senses it.  And that same someone is thinking of you and takes the time out of their day to sit down and write you their thoughts about you.  It's endearing really; to be so thought about, mentally picked apart and shoved through an emotional cheese grater. 
It's flattering really to be the sprinkles on the ice cream of life and all that is wrong with it.  I am the pinnacle of EPIC. FAIL and he takes the time out of his "80" hour work week {while I have the kids} to sit down and jot me out - not a note, or a thought but an ENTIRE.FULL.PAGE.EMAIL.
Just for me.  Oh, 7 emails...I am literally watching that nifty lil number grow as I type this out. 

When I lie down tonight to fall into sweet slumber... {insomnia major} I will reflect back on this thoughty little gesture of
{no joke 8 emails...another just rolled in}
kindness and smile.
For as I live in this world in my mind he lives in the one I have created in the pages of a book.  And I might just say, he doesn't like it there...nor does he last very long.  {evil smirk}
But I also might point out the beauty of the written word within the pages of a novel.  
It can be read OVER and over and over until your funny bone is so tickled life allows you to smile again.
Huh?  Yes, I am smiling right now, a big, toothy grin, sort of like a jack-o-lantern.
If my works are ever published, you will surely find Mr. B within the pages of the story for he has not learned his manners their either.  Yes, of course I'm written in as thin and beautiful and he's extremely unattractive.  Retribution, even if only within your own imagination, can be very rewarding.  I suggest writing to everyone, especially the horribly mistreated and disgruntled {attractive...wink} ex-wives like myself.  But that's neither here nor there...

I had commented
"treat me like a human being and I will correspond with you through email"
And poor guy, he just can't seem to do it. 
{I know, me a human...Really?}
But in order to soften the blow if you will, of how intolerant I am as a human he says it like this. 

{Insert condescending, badgering, abusive slur here}
and then follow it up with "just sayin'" 
Haha!  Is that polite or "oops I did it again?"  {snicker}

Maybe someday I might be able to return his attentive words of sacrifice.  Might I one day find it in me to take the time out of my schedule {that has limitless hours as all Moms know} and re-pay his kindness with a dose of my own thoughts of him? 
Hmm...maybe not.  I already have to repent enough as it is.  {wink}

You all are so patient and tolerant of me.  But I know deep down inside you all have a Mr. B and your
“BOOKS”are already being mentally written!  
{and re-read}

Regret is such a hard thing to live with...and to think I let that fish back in the pond..."Just sayin'"....

Still smilin’ on this early, early Monday morning!

Happy Halloween!



Thursday, October 27, 2011

Love Me Some Fall...

I’m originally from California…in case you didn’t know that little tidbit.  And oh, how I ache for Cali…except during Fall
In the Mountains of Western North Carolina
{which are a totally different type of mountains than the west}
They really know how to put on a show when it comes to Autumn.  I was late in getting the pictures, mainly because I asked my daughter, Moi, to take the pics.  She’s the photographer of the family and I am the appreciator of photography in the family. 
{Funny how it all evens out huh? Wink}
Well, she just got too busy so I had to do it…sorry.
{Insert sad face here.}

Here are two pics Moi took of Fall last year.

Now bear with me as I show you my variation.  This post is dedicated to Salena who doesn’t get Fall out in Hawaii.
{It’s okay Salena, you can dedicate your Summers to me.}
Our Summers would be pics of my crazy nappy curls lashing out at the humidity!

This is one of my craft room windows.  See my Scentsy…she appreciates a good view too ..wink

This is my view out that window…It’s actually so much wider and more beautiful than this.

We're working on "forging a path" We live on almost 4 acres and most of it is woods... So much exploration to be had, so little time to play.

Leaves begin falling
Apple cinnamon bakes
The winds are swirling
Chocolate cocoa you’ll make

Rain drips from gutters
Grass fades to brown
Chill turns to bitter
Sparkling roofs fill the town

Sweaters replace t-shirts
In your mittens you shake
Coats buttoned tightly
Frost turns into flakes
Autumn is churning
Amber sunsets laced gold
Sweet spices sing the whirlwinds
One more year you will fold

Above is our “Cottage” it’s a storage room /workshop.  The owner’s father built it so very long ago.  I love it.  It speaks to me.  Even the door handles are nostalgic.  The cottage hides behind a large apple tree that cradles it with whining branches, heavy laden with years.  Oh, how I love this place, especial in Autumn.

Linking Up with Casey Wiegand

Enjoy the view; wherever you may be standing!




Me: “I’m hungry.”
Po: “Me too.”
Me: “What do you want?”
Po: “I don’t know.”

Do you have these intellectual conversations in your marriage?  Are these mind boggling discussions just floating in and out of your everyday life challenge?  Yah, I thought so.  Do you know what I’m going to do about it?  Me either.

Dang, indecision is just haunting me lately.  I get on these kicks to where I get so tired of making every single decision in this family that even deciding what to have as a snack seems exhausting.  

Am I alone in this frustration?
{Hey!  Who said that?   Always a heckler..}

But honestly it drives me crazy.  And just to be a rebel I tell myself I’m going to go into the kitchen and make myself a snack and NOT  him because he wont’ make a decision.  But then I realize three things:

  1. That’s really lame.  {Funny… but lame}

  1. My husband has those beautiful cow brown eyes that would be so sad when he saw me eating and I didn’t get anything for him because that is SO not like me so he would totally KNOW  he was in the doghouse but being a man would NEVER  be able to figure out why.  {No, I don’t know what a run-on sentence is…maybe you should tell me again. wink}

  1. And last but not least Po is playing online with my dad {literally has the headset on talking to him} and he would tell on me.  Then my Mama would find out then my Mama and I would laugh and laugh and laugh about how funny and petty I was and that she should do that to my daddy too later in the week.  {And then we would both wake up and be irritated that not only would we never do that but they would never care that much and just keep playing their game.}  It’s a funny thought, you’ve got to admit.

{Yes, I generally put a lot of thought into my pathetic but entertaining day dreams.  You don’t?  Really?  Some days they’re the only thing that keeps me going.}

You know in the movie “Monster in-law” where the mother-in-law grabs soon to be daughter-in-law and smashes her head into the cake several times then it flashes back to reality and you realize she was just visualizing the whole thing?  That’s me.  I love to picture, in great detail, how I wish I could react to situations.  But not in this situation, I really just wish Po would make a decision for me.  So it must be that he’s really just not that hungry.

But I am.  I’m getting a snack.  It will involve soda.  Possibly chips.  Possibly Po. 
Possibly a call to Mama for some giggles.



Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Winner of the Fall Sign Giveaway!

Happy Lawn Day Everyone!  Well, Happy it's over lawn day anyway! {grin}
Okay, just jumping on here for a quick announcement of the winner of the Fall sign giveaway for you wondermous people who got me to 100.  Incidentally I was doing donuts on the riding lawn mower today and Yes, I did get dizzy! {wink}

The winner of the Fall Sign Giveaway 
is none other than
Nay from 

Nay said:  I'll be in North Carolina visiting my bloggy bff - wouldn't that be so cool?! But no - we're going to my brother's in-law's place, trick-or-treating around their neighborhood, eating pizza (me salad oy!), taking pics, and going through the haunted mansion that my bro's brother-in-law makes every's like a movie set - pretty coolio!

I know you're all going...Aww..what?!  That's her bloggy me I let out a big what the????  
Po was like, "What's wrong?"  I told him and he was excited for Nay.  Well, I felt weird but I want you to know I spent Waaayyyy more time than I should mention trying to figure out how to transfer the screen shot of Random {dot} org so I could prove it!
Ughh.... I'm such a paranoid ding dong!  
But Po said, "Hey, they either know you or they don't.  Besides you already sent a sign to Nay for Halloween."
Me:  "Huh?  Oh, true."

I've really got to stop over-thinking things.  
{Doubtful, but I'll try.  Okay, I tried...can't...sorry}

So there you have it, congratulations to Nay!  I'm now happy for you, unless you don't like it...which means you entered the giveaway out of obligation...which means... You are a really, really, good friend! 
{And Haha! Karma bit you in the bum!}

Happy Wednesday All!
{Wait it is Wednesday right?  Oh, whew…}



Tuesday, October 25, 2011

10 Reasons for Zero Inspiration to Post today..

1.     I’m hungry and can’t find what I really want.
{Yes my world revolves around food.  Believe it or not, my stomach speaks louder than my words.  Really.}

2.     My kids keep coming in and out of both doors to my room. 
{At this point I am more inspired to peel off my own skin.  Maybe not... 
{knock, knock Maybe so.}

3.  My brain is fried.  Monday was busy, Tuesday, busier. 
{I just want to make stuffed pumpkins.  Lil stuffed and chunky, pumpkins…sniff.}

4. I had a dream about the “current” book I’m working on; well, the current book I haven’t been working on.  I haven’t had the time to write lately.  It’s killing me.  I love to post and check in with you guys but there are characters literally waiting to see what they do next. 
{I owe them.  And they’re probably really hungry just like me right now} wink

5. It’s cold.  My inspiration is based on a warm house.  Spoiled?  {snicker}

6. I have another job interview.  I might barf.
{Not at the interview….grin}

7. Today I went to take my dingoes {freakin’ sled dogs} out and they pulled me off the porch bypassing 4 stairs and I saw my life flash before my eyes.   
{Turns out it was pretty anticlimactic}  
 But I thought I was going head first into the gravel.   
{I didn’t.} 
But my body is screaming at me and making fun of me.  The landing was far from graceful.  So, I’m sulking on my heating pad again. 
{I can’t spend time on inspiration when I’m focusing on sulking.   
It’s an unwritten law.}

8. In the back of my brain I’m still thinking about the mini paper pumpkins I need to make for the boy’s classes. 
{Huh?  Am I working on them?  No, just thinking about them.  It wouldn’t be proper procrastination if I was actually working on them…wink}

9. I’m texting Nay and that is more inspiring than writing a witty post.   
{She’s wittier than me tonight, so I’m having a good time.  But I realize it bites for those of you reading this right now…giggle}

10. I’m still hungry. 
{The end.}

Yes, I promise to work on my pumpkins, and the lil paper ones for the boys, and write and …my attitude! wink

Linking up with Miss Mommy



Monday, October 24, 2011

Good Morning Monday!

I find that if I say Good Morning Monday with enthusiasm then I might start to believe it’s a good thing. 
{Fine, that’s positive thinking…so far, it hasn’t worked!}

In actuality it was Waaaayyy too warm and cozy in bed this morning and 5am taunted me.  So in order to fight back I re-set the alarm to 5:35am and mocked it right back!
{Oh, yes I did.}
I have another craft class to teach today and I actually got everything ready and packed up last night and began cutting mini paper for pumpkins for the boy’s classes for them to give to their classmates for Halloween.  But in being efficient and getting ahead  
{because I’m so very organized and never get distracted…wink}
I forgot to write my post for the blog. 

So here is a funny for Monday.  I am so mad, Hanna had one of her “one liners” yesterday and I totally forgot to write it down; hence, my memory is only of laughter.

This will have to suffice.  Just another day getting ready for school after Moi has left for Seminary and the boys have caught their bus.  This is what I am left with.
 Yes, this “conversation if you will. 
Yes, this is word for word. 
Yes, this happens often.
Why would you even bring up ADHD?  That’s a funny question…hmm

Hanna looks to Busy:  You, You  Insulin fool!
{Spoken in her best I’ll take over the world British accent.}
{Yes, Busy is a diabetic.}
Busy:  “Scared Potter?” {spoken in a British accent}
Hanna:  “You wish!” {Not as polished British accent…grin}
Hanna:  This was just a sad mis-confusion
Busy:  “Now, I’m scared Potter…” {again with the British}
Busy sings:  “Come on, Come on do the locomotion with me...”
Hanna:  I thought it was the hokey pokey?
Both sing:  “Come on, Come on do the hokey pokey with me…”
Busy throws ice at Hanna
Both sing:  “Ice ice baby…chicken rice and gravy…”
Me:  I think you’re missing the bus, like right now.”
{Looks of astonishment from the girls}
Inside my brain:  Thank you school for being there for me every day.  Thank you Mr. School Bus driver for picking up my hooligans and taking them to school….
Hanna as she runs out the door:  “My cheese…noooo…..” exits…
Busy:  “Peanut Blart and Jelley {In a British accent}  she exits…
Both pop their heads back in the door….”Bye mom I love you.”
Me:  “I love you back!”
Yah, I’ve got nothin’…..
It was a good morning.  Thank goodness for no distraction.

Have a Fantabulous Monday!
{Yah, I’m still tryin’…wink!}



Thursday, October 20, 2011

Goals and Setbacks...Small Business Month

Small Business Month 
Challenge #5 and #6

It’s that time again…well it was that time again and I deliberately avoided it.  Challenge was to  
write out your goals for your business

I didn’t want to.

{Sorry Nicole} 
That was for Tuesday.

And then do you know what the next challenge to write about was? 

What is holding you back from reaching those goals?
 That was for Thursday.

Are you sensing what I’m sensing?  A big fat LONG explanation to the above mentioned assignments?

You’re right!!!!

Okay, so most will talk about time management, money, product development, or children…umm yah, just count me in those too.  But do you know what hit me?  And I’m gonna jump on my soap box right now as a matter a fact.  
 {Hey, I’m only 5’3” I feel better on the box}
It is such an emotional and ridiculous reason I didn’t want to complete challenge #5.

I’m pretty certain Mr. B reads my blog.  I’ve been humiliated time and time again and when I fail, he is there to thoughtfully throw it in my face.  When I don’t fail, he assures me that I did.  I didn’t want to put my goals out there.  He will only laugh.  He’s successful, he’s money.  I am that sad little woman that works in a diner {hypothetically speaking} that you see in all of those stereo typical women movies.  You know the "poor mom".  Except Mr. B likes to remind me while my professional years are long gone due to raising children I now cannot get a job.  So, I caved to the anticipated defeat of him …well, making fun of my attempts to work from home.

I have learned as of late if you don’t get paid via a consistent paycheck then you don’t work. People say pretty things but in actuality they will then turn and without thought spurt out something about you not working. 

Example:  “Andi, do you work?”
“Yah, I work from home.”
“Oh, then can you watch my son during the day while I work?” 
Huh?  Really?  Didn’t I just say I work from home?

This kind of mentality, coupled with Mr. B’s gentle {definitely not gentle but hateful} several page long emails, phone calls and texts of “You are a loser” is what holds me back!

Today, after another bout of why I am a failure to my kids, the church, my family and the world.  I sat there just staring out the kitchen window.  Po who is a man of few words as it is said something that struck me.  {Daddy said once that Po uses words as if they cost him.  Love that.}
Anyway, Po looked at me and said, “Why do you let him get to you?”
Translation: He, as in Po, is the only one whose opinion matters now.  He, as in Po, is my husband, my rock, my partner in crime.  He’s right.
It happens. 
{Actually Po is right a lot.  I’m cool with that though.  He chose me didn’t he?  Hahahahahah!}

Major set back number 1 crushed!  done!  OUT.OF.THE.WAY!

So, I’m writing it.  Putting it out there.  And one day when PidgApeg Cottage is featured in …yah well I don’t read magazines..but one day when I’m Rich it won’t matter!   
Okay, so that was the crazy “I’ll take over the world me”.  In actuality, I don’t have to think about “one day”.  I’m just a girl trying the best she can for her family.  That’s a little bit of success right there.  No defeat, just keep moving forward. 
This, according to my goals at the bottom, is what I am now doing to keep myself accountable.

Money? Save up.  I even like to do it in cute mason jars {I hide from the kids} so that it’s simple and pretty.  I have jars for several things that my husband didn’t even know I stashed for.  It’s not much, but it helps and it adds up and if I need something and the business itself can’t pay for it, then I wait.

Time Management?  I am starting a new type of calendaring.  One with actual blocks of time reserved.  I have actual work hours so that the kids know and I know when I need to be doing certain tasks.  With ADHD I most likely get a bit more distracted than most of you efficient chickees out there.  My calendar is much more detailed; my notes longer.  I also am starting to actually schedule in the two things I hate most.  {Could not tell you why…I have no idea}  But one is listing items…and two is making packaging.  I find that when I sell the item and my packaging is not ready I get irritated.  So, normally, my cutsie packaging {ie: bag toppers, cards, tags, boxes} are already made, ready to grab and be dropped into the shipping box.

I also schedule in time for chores, kids and my husband.  If someone gets sick or needs to be picked up, then that slot is shifted with another.

Product Development?  Man, I have so many ideas in my brain it’s ridiculous.  Then I get on Etsy and go into creative overload.  I get so excited and distracted then disappointed that I can’t do it all and end up accomplishing nothing.  Now, I write down my ideas and categorize them according to priority.  Mostly this is for the clay jewelry in PidgApeg Outloud and the homespun stuff in PidgApeg Cottage.  The jewelry shop is pretty much therapeutic and I keep if fairly filled.  It’s the other two because they require a bit more creativity.  So I prioritize what I want to try first then categorizing the new items according to what uses the same supplies then roll it out.  Hopefully, if this new system works you will be seeing those two particular shops a bit more full.

Children?  Sorry, I got nothin’.  I love them, can’t send them away.  But I have gotten a lot more efficient in using my time wisely.  Now that Mr. B lives here.  I use that time the kids are with him to work and only work.  Po comes in to check on me but he’s supportive knowing that I “need” to be in the craft room solid when they’re gone.

Now, lets back this train up.  Here are my goals.  Laughter or not; mean comments or not…mean comments because they come anyway.  I had them written out but now I have the courage to put them out for you guys.  The few of us that have built a little small business bond.  I’m sorry, I flaked this week.

Goals for PidgApeg:

Carry at least 100 items in PidgApeg by November 15th, 2011.
Carry at least 75 items for PidgApeg OutLoud by November 20th, 2011.
Purchase monthly add spaces on at least 3 blogs by January 1st, 2012
Release my holiday line for PidgApeg Cottage by November 25th, 2011.
Release my Spring line for PidgApeg Cottage by March 1st, 2012.

Yes, I realize some of these goals are super close together, however some of them I am already on top of.  I have found that goal setting even in small increments has helped me achieve what I need to.  But unless I put it up there in front of me, it just doesn’t happen.  I have sat on so many things that I have made and simply didn’t get them listed.

That’s it.  Simple.  I will continue to add more goals to replace the old ones.  Baby steps, soon to be smarter and larger steps.  But remember, I’m just a girl…

Thanks for listening, reading and being supportive.  I mean that you know.

Linking it up with the Bold and Beautiful Nicole...
{Cute right? haha!}



Copy Cat Post...Confessions...

Sorry for the double post today.  I didn’t realize I was double booked.  
{Haha! That makes me sound important so I’m just gonna go with it!}

I can give you the day off tomorrow if you want me to!  
{How 'bout I'll think about it.  wink}

So, lil Miss Nay and I are at it again.  We thought it would be fun to do another “Copy Cat Post” Last week I noticed a few of you that jumped on the 50 questions post idea.  That was so much fun!  Why when I read someone else’s is it totally entertaining and not nearly as drag out long as crud as mine was?

This time Nay put me in charge of the theme and in the spirit of always telling on myself I chose “Dorky Confessions”.  Well, I don’t think dorky was involved until I actually wrote mine…hehe

Haha! {still giggling}  snicker…okay.  I’m totally going to confess something ridiculous and you can all JUDGE me.  Anyone who knows me knows I really don’t care.  I march to the beat of my own drum…even if there’s no drum. {wink}

So, Monday I had a horrible headache starting.  I get migraines and so I didn’t want it turning into one of those.  I wanted to write but I didn’t want to focus on all of the lil words just yet because they hurt my brain.  I also didn’t want to bring in my computer from the craft room into the bedroom.  My back also has been giving me crud so I needed to chill on my heating pad {yah, I know …I’m such a grandma} and do something that would allow me to be interrupted.  Huh?  Well, not only can I not look at small print when my brain aches but I can’t write when the kids are in and out.  I get into this incredible “zone”.  I literally go into the world I’m writing.  With Mp3 player in my ears and words flowing fluidly from my fingertips kids crashing in is like waking me up when I just fell asleep… 


So, I write when the kids are so busy they won’t interrupt or when they’re sleeping.  I sat on my bed.  {sulking a lil} 
Po walked out.
He came back with my computer, and heating pad.  He plugged me all in and then grinned.  “You should play your game.” He said with a smile.

I laughed, “No, I’m just a dork face.”
“Play your game.  It makes you smile when you decorate.” He said as he smiled again.

He kissed my forehead then you know what I did?

I Played FARMVILLE!  Oh, yes I did!

What’s even better is that I really didn’t play I just decorated for Halloween!  I totally saw the comment on Facebook the other day about their Farmville confessions and how they wished they could get that time back.  Would you like to know why I didn’t comment?  Because I'm the only one thinking I wish had more time to play it! Haha!  
{I feel so free right now! Wink}
I have insomnia.  Sometimes it’s worse than other times.  Farmville was perfect.  Sure I haven’t played in months but I think it’s great. 
{Now, I blog when others sleep}
But Farmville is free and cute and helps when I can’t sleep or can’t write yet, but my back is mad at me.  It’s there for me and I had forgotten that.  Haha!  Okay that was overboard but still it’s not like I clog up my wall or anyone elses with it.  I’m a considerate farmer.  Well, when I was a farmer.  How I miss you…. {sniff} 

I wish I had more time to play it.  {I’m such a dorkwad}  But as long as you don’t let it take you over {any game for that matter} then I think they’re very therapeutic.  It’s all about moderation. 
{And being stuck in bed for a few hours!  But still it was nice}
{I can totally see my GFC going down as I write this post.} Haha!

Hey you guys never said I had to be cool to blog right?  Right?

I just thought I would tell you that, because I had so much fun doing nothing for a lil bit the other night while I waited for my headache to thankfully get better instead of worse.  {Good meds} wink.

Wait, I hear a drum…I better go follow it! Wink

Cover to Cover

Now go sneak over and read Nay's Copy Cat Post
{Hint:  hit her new typewriter button she's so excited about!}