Thursday, September 8, 2011

Avoidance or Distraction?


Avoidance is a funny thing...

I’m supposed to {once again} be cleaning up and organizing my workspace.  It is in dire need of such a lift.  If I don’t I will continue to work unproductively and in extreme frustration.  

Pair this thought with the fact that I have ADHD and children...even clinical studies cannot determine which is worse.  {giggle}

So I came in here to start.  I looked around at my room; my beautifully messy room with about 5 projects all in various stages of creation.  I noticed my laptop.  Oh, I really should check my email. 

So I did.

Then I checked my shopsthen Facebook.  Oh, look I have some new “followers” on the Cottage, I should really go and look.

So I did.

Then I got up & looked at my room.  The kids called.  {They’re at their dad’s again}  Dealt with said “fire”.  Oh, my room.  I went back in and looked around some more.  I moved one box to a chair.  I sat in the chair next to it and looked at my laptop.  I probably should blog; maybe get ahead on a few posts.

So I did.

{Incidentally, this is not the blog I wrote.  This is the second.}

I then proceeded to stand again, with all of my might and determination and stood before a certain bookshelf that just doesn’t seem to have met its full potential.  I stood silently, and in thoughtful contemplation of how to allow it to reach its highest level of usefulness.  

Nothing. 

So I turned back and looked to my over-crowded “main” craft table.  I then looked to my laptop.  Oh, I like this song.  I better check the thumbs up button on Pandora so it will come up again on my playlist. 

So I did.

I need to go visit Po.  We like to spend every moment we can together.  Strange I knowbut it’s a true story.  Recently we have had to allow me to be in the workshop at night when the original deal was that I would work during the day and work on my writing at night so I could be in the room with him.

{Funny thingIf someone would organize the workspace I would strangely work more capably and efficiently making more of my time with being able to find everything}
Weird right?  I know.


But I decided I needed to visit.  I, in order to be a good wife, must visit and give him loves and reassurance of wife-proclaimed adoration for him because that keeps our relationship fresh and on the front burner of priorities.

So I did.

Came back into the room.  Looked. Around. Again.  Wait, another song to checkoh, Jack is in need of petting because he loves me and I love him and he’s the best dog besides Charlie andHey, where IS Charlie?  I should go find him.

So I did.

Enter room, sensing I need to be doing something.  What was it?  Went back into my bedroom; at this point I have no idea why.  Dang, it really is dusty in here because of the open windows and ceiling fan as of late.  I can’t wait until they pave that side road.  Oh, the vacuum. I’ll get the hand vac attachment and vacuum the dust off the walls. 

Yes, I did these types of things during all 6 of my pregnancies.  The doctor and 3.745 million women told me it was nesting.  They lied.  It’s my personality.  Vacuum the walls?  Yes.

So I did.

This was probably when I sat down moved some of my inventory into a container then moved it swiftly back to where I had it.  Then Busy called, she needed loves because she was homesick.  So we read a scripture together, talked about it; then I sent her on her way to sleepies with the thought of her favorite scene in a story we are writing together.  

Meanwhile, I need a new soda, had to mark a song I did not like on my playlist, kissed Po again {I like to do that} I folded a few pieces of fabric then sat back down to my laptop. 

Emailwhy must you torment me so?  I put my slippers on because my feet were cold, grabbed my zip up because I’m always cold at night, looked around the room again, moved markers into another drawer, went pee, came back and began writing the second post.  {Yah, this one.}

I went into the kitchen.  I have this huge picture window and at night it can “almost” be a mirror.  I caught a glimpse of myself in it, while wearing sweats.  I turned slightly, Hmm, I look like I’m losing weight.

{I’m not mind you, it was cruel trickery of the angle I was standing.} 

Needless to say even though I knew that I grinned.  I turned promptly and smiled widely when my husband came in to “check on me”.  {He does that too, it’s pretty neat.}  So we both decided 11:30pm was a perfect time for snackage.   
{Fleeting thought of mysterious weight gain…} 




Yesterday for another example, I came into my room to work.  I had to go back to my bedroom to grab my cell phone.  I noticed I needed to put something on the grocery list went to the kitchen to grab the list and ended up making homemade salsa.  I never got my cell phone or the list and realized that after I looked at the salsa thinking of how the kids would love it when they got home for an after school snack because salsa is our kind of comfort food and realized holy cow the school might have called, where is my phone?

This IS my life

Actually, this is how it always is.  I am so thankful Heavenly Father gifted me with a blissfully life-saving sense of humor.  Otherwise I would spend a lot of time being angry at myself for reasons I probably wouldn’t have the focus to remember.  {Haha!.funny, but true}

So I question, is it distraction masked as avoidance?  Or perhaps avoidance disguised as distraction?  Both maybe?  It really doesn’t matter if the end result is

I need to clean up my workshop.

I did not.

I might.

I’ll think about it.

Can we talk about this later?  I need to go put something on the grocery list. {wink}


 loves,


Pidg

2 comments:

  1. OMG!!! Literally trying to hold in busting out laughing!!!! You and I are so much alike! It's scary. :) My house is a mess with my 3 little ones, it never gets organized. My days are like you have written here. I can totally relate, I love this. :)

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  2. OMG!!! This is fantastic!! I am the same way...I only have a 3 year old and an infant but have gained family members being a Navy wife on top of one of my brother's who always comes by (totally cool) haha...but yes, I call my issue "shiny object syndrome" and "SQUIRREL" moments (from the dog, Doug, in the movie "Up") haha...anyways... :)

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